In China, with the arrival of an aging society, elderly care has drawn widespread attention. What people talk about most is what model of elderly care should be adopted. Most people believe that the elderly-care model needs to be diversified. To achieve this, through governmental guidance and social participation, we can build more and better elderly-care institutions, improve community service centers, encourage self-supported home-based elderly care, and promote a combination of family-based and society-based elderly care. With the continuous increase in government and social investment in elderly-care services, elderly-care facilities will be steadily upgraded, service quality will gradually improve, and the elderly will live a more convenient, comfortable, healthy and happy life.
逐句译法
1. 在中国,随着老龄化社会的到来,养老受到普遍关注。
参考译法:In China, with the arrival of an aging society, elderly care has drawn widespread attention.
主干:养老(作主语)+受到关注(谓语)(主语策略:原句主语)核心是养老受到普遍关注,主语"养老"=elderly care,谓语"受到普遍关注"用被动 has drawn / receives widespread attention,宾语是 attention。"在中国""随着老龄化社会的到来"都是背景状语,不进主干。
语法点:- 语态"养老受到关注"是"养老"承受"关注"这个动作,用被动更自然:elderly care has drawn widespread attention(draw 主动表"引起"亦可),切忌写成 elderly care pays attention 这种主客颠倒。 - 时态回指全篇基调用一般现在时 / 现在完成时;本句陈述当下普遍状态,用 has drawn(强调已成普遍现象)或 receives 均可。 - 冠词与单复数"老龄化社会"泛指一类社会,用不定冠词 an aging society;elderly care 为不可数抽象概念,不加 -s、不加冠词。
降级处理:两层背景降级为介词短语"在中国"降为介词短语 In China 置句首;随着老龄化社会的到来降为 with the arrival of an aging society(with + 名词短语),不另起一句、不用 and 平铺。两个状语都挂在主干前,主干只保留"养老受到关注"。
2. 人们谈论最多的是应当采取什么样的养老模式。
参考译法:What people talk about most is what model of elderly care should be adopted.
主干:What引导的主语从句作真正话题(主语策略:形式主语it)人们谈论最多的是应当采取什么样的养老模式核心是"人们最常谈论的(话题)是 X"。可用 What people talk about most is… 直接以 what 从句作主语;也可写 The most discussed topic is…。谓语是系动词 is,表语是"该采取什么养老模式"这个间接问句。
语法点:- 时态主句陈述当下普遍现象,用一般现在时 is,回指全篇基调。 - 语态"应当采取"的逻辑承受者是"模式",从句用被动 should be adopted,比补一个泛泛主语 we should adopt 更客观,契合说明文语体。 - 单复数与搭配"养老模式"此处泛指某一种待选模式,用单数 model;搭配用 model of elderly care 或 elderly-care model,固定沿用 glossary 译法。
降级处理:宾语从句嵌入表语"应当采取什么样的养老模式"作表语,降级为名词性从句 what model of elderly care should be adopted(间接疑问,疑问词 what + 陈述语序)。"应当采取"用 should be adopted 表"应被采取",把"采取"的对象"模式"提作从句主语。
3. 多数人认为,养老模式需要多元化。
参考译法:Most people believe that the elderly-care model needs to be diversified.
主干:Most people(主)+believe(谓)+that从句(宾)(主语策略:原句主语)多数人认为,养老模式需要多元化主语"多数人"=Most people,谓语"认为"=believe / hold,宾语是 that 引导的宾语从句"养老模式需要多元化"。
语法点:- 时态"多数人认为"是当下普遍看法,主句与从句都用一般现在时,回指全篇基调。 - 主谓一致Most people 为复数,谓语用 believe(不加 -s);从句主语 the model 为单数第三人称,谓语 needs 要加 -s,两处别混。 - 搭配"需要多元化"=needs to be diversified(need to do);"多元"亦可名词化为 a diversity of models,但与 glossary 单数 model 表述需协调,此处取 be diversified 更省心。
降级处理:本就是主从句无需再降级"养老模式需要多元化"作 that 从句,主语 the elderly-care model,谓语 needs to be,表语 diversified("多元化"用形容词/过去分词表状态)。结构本就清晰,只需把"多元化"这个动词性中文词转成 be diversified 即可。
参考译法:Through governmental guidance and social participation, we can build more and better elderly-care institutions, improve community service centers, encourage self-supported home-based elderly care, and promote a combination of family-based and society-based elderly care.
语法点:- 时态语态讲"可以采取的做法",用 We can + 动词原形(一般现在时情态结构);若想更客观可整体转被动:…can be established and improved,主语换成措施对象。 - 单复数"更多更好的养老服务机构"是复数 more and better elderly-care institutions(-s);"社区服务中心"泛指多个,用复数 community service centers。可数名词逐个定数。 - 搭配与并列对齐四个动词搭配各就位:build/establish institutions、improve centers、encourage self-supported home-based care、promote a combination of…;四项词性须对齐(都用动词原形),不可一项用动词、一项突然换成名词。 - 用词统一"居家自助养老""家庭养老与社会养老相结合"沿用 glossary 既定译法 self-supported home-based elderly care、a combination of family-based and society-based elderly care,全篇一致。
降级处理:通过…降为by短语,四措施并列通过政府引导和社会参与降级为方式状语 through governmental guidance and social participation(through + 名词,不译成从句);其后"建立""改进""鼓励""推行"四个动作并列作 can 的并列谓语,用逗号 + and 连接最后一项:build…, improve…, encourage…, and promote…,结构整齐不流水。
参考译法:With the continuous increase in government and social investment in elderly-care services, elderly-care facilities will be steadily upgraded, service quality will gradually improve, and the elderly will live a more convenient, comfortable, healthy and happy life.
主干:三个并列主谓预测未来(主语策略:原句主语)本句主干是三组"什么将怎样"的并列分句:养老设施将不断升级facilities will be upgraded、服务质量逐步改进service quality will improve、老年人的生活将会更加方便舒适\、健康快乐the elderly will live more conveniently…。"随着……投入的持续增加"是背景状语,不进主干。
语法点:- 时态本句是全篇唯一偏离基调处:"将不断升级""将会更加"是对未来的预测,三个分句统一用一般将来时 will be upgraded / will improve / will live,与前四句的一般现在时区分。 - 语态"养老设施将升级"中设施是被升级的承受者,用被动 will be upgraded;"服务质量改进"可用 improve 的不及物主动 will improve(质量自身变好),两者各按逻辑定。 - 单复数与冠词"养老设施"复数 facilities;"老年人"用 the elderly(the + 形容词表一类人,作复数)或 elderly people,谓语相应用复数 will live。 - 搭配"对……的投入"=investment in…(介词 in,不是 to);"持续增加"=continuous increase / continuously increase。
降级处理:随着…降为with短语,结果分句并列随着政府和社会对养老服务事业投入的持续增加降级为 with the continuous increase in government and social investment in elderly-care services(with + 名词短语);三组结果分句并列作主干,末项"方便舒适、健康快乐"可用副词 more conveniently and comfortably, healthily and happily 修饰"生活/活着"。
词汇与译名提示
养老模式统一译作 the elderly-care model / models of elderly care。养老模式反复出现,全篇固定用 elderly care 表"养老",避免一会儿 pension、一会儿 old-age support 来回换。
老龄化社会统一译作 an aging society。老龄化社会的到来中"老龄化"用 aging(动名词作定语),不写成 old society 这类中式直译。
家庭养老与社会养老相结合统一译作 a combination of family-based and society-based elderly care。家庭养老与社会养老相结合的模式中两个"养老"沿用 elderly care,用 family-based / society-based 区分依托主体。
第2句承接第1句话题,用代词避免重复第1句点出"养老受到关注",第2句"人们谈论最多的"正是顺着这关注往下说。两句本身衔接自然;为更紧凑,第2句可借 As for this(至于这一点)或直接以 What people talk about most 开头承接"关注"的话题,不必再重复 elderly care 一词。
第3句与第2句之间补语义过渡第2句抛出"该用什么模式"的问题,第3句"多数人认为需要多元化"是对这问题的回答。可在第3句前用 In response 或直接以 Most people believe 自然承接,读者能感到"问题—回答"的逻辑流,无需另加生硬连接词。
第4句紧扣第3句"多元化"展开具体做法第3句说"需要多元化",第4句的四条措施正是"如何多元化"的具体落地。两句间可补一句过渡感的衔接:第4句以 To achieve this(为实现这一点)开头,把"多元化"这个抽象主张和后面四条具体做法显式接上,避免读者觉得措施罗列得突兀。
第5句以背景状语自然收束全篇第5句 With the continuous increase… 开头的背景状语本身就起到承上启下的展望作用,把前面"该怎么做"自然过渡到"做了之后会怎样"。结尾三组 will… 并列,给全篇一个向好的收束,无需再加额外连接词。